As a behavioral specialist, it’s my literal job to solve people’s problems. So any time I see someone who’s struggling (client, friend, family member, TV character…), my first instinct is to give advice, solicited or not.

But wait a second. When I’m struggling, usually what I want is to rant or mope or just be hugged. I’m not looking for a solution, I’m looking for someone to see me, hear me, hug me. I just want them to hold space for me.